8:50 PM
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Sixty-Seven Reasons
Sixty-Seven Reasons Why It's Great To Be A Girl
1. You live longer.
2. You mature faster.
3. You never have to pay for a drink.
4. Doors just get opened for you everywhere you go.
5. Heavy things are for boys to take care of.
6. So are spiders.
7. You’re patient when it doesn’t work right and don’t opt to immediately throw it out the window.
8. Taking pictures has real importance… it’s a documentation of your life.
9. You can multi-task.
10. You actually listen to directions.
11. When going to a formal event, you get to wear just one article of clothing.
12. You’re supposed to have a little woman meat on your hips.
13. Johnny Depp.
14. The bed is all yours.
15. You can love and hate something at the same time.
16. You (usually) get to be on bottom.
17. You can fake it if you’re tired or bored and they’ll never know.
18. Valentine’s Day is all about you.
19. Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable” just makes you happy even if you hate the song.
20. Baking is also a stress reliever.
21. You can get a massage without a hardon.
22. “That time of the month” is a great excuse to be a bitch for a week.
23. It’s also the best and most effective way to turn a guy down.
24. OMG shoes.
25. You think the idea of sack-tapping a guy is funny.
26. It’s perfectly normal to have a 2 hour conversation with your best friend.
27. In books or movies, happy endings actually make you happy.
28. You read instructions.
29. You already know you’ll be successful.
30. The current president just makes you realize women should rule the world.
31. You too get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours.
32. Clothes shopping is not just a chore.
33. Sex and the City.
34. You never have to worry that by just picking up something you’ll crush it.
35. If there’s a mirror, you’ll find it.
36. No one seriously questions your sexuality if you kiss the same sex.
37. Video games will forever be retarded.
38. You love miniature things, like mini gummy bears or tiny marshmallows.
39. Victoria's Secret Lip Plumper is just fun.
40. God gave you enough blood to work both.
41. Your ego isn’t the size of the US.
42. Everything you need is in your purse.
43. You take hot baths when you need to relax.
44. You’re not considered a pussy if you don’t hook up.
45. You feel totally comfortable asking for help or advice when lost or stuck.
46. They buy the condoms.
47. The Notebook.
48. You can cry your way out of a speeding ticket.
49. The thought of dinner with his family doesn’t scare you.
50. The closet is yours and yours alone.
51. The movie 300 kinda made you orgasm. Just a little.
52. When you’re mad, they might not find out until later when it’s convenient for you to let them know.
53. Girls’ nights whomp ass over boys’ nights.
54. You never have to deal with fixing electronics or cars.
55. You’re hygienic.
56. You can dance with the same sex at every opportunity.
57. You know how to match.
58. You know how to fold clothes.
59. No one is afraid of you when you walk down a dark alley at night.
60. Just talking about it makes you feel better.
61. Prince William is now single.
62. You never have to worry that the kid isn’t really yours.
63. No one thinks it’s weird if you squeal or make noises instead of words.
64. The idea of a man servant really appeals to you.
65. You will never be drafted.
66. No one secretly wonders how big you really are.
67. You support world peace.
1. You live longer.
2. You mature faster.
3. You never have to pay for a drink.
4. Doors just get opened for you everywhere you go.
5. Heavy things are for boys to take care of.
6. So are spiders.
7. You’re patient when it doesn’t work right and don’t opt to immediately throw it out the window.
8. Taking pictures has real importance… it’s a documentation of your life.
9. You can multi-task.
10. You actually listen to directions.
11. When going to a formal event, you get to wear just one article of clothing.
12. You’re supposed to have a little woman meat on your hips.
13. Johnny Depp.
14. The bed is all yours.
15. You can love and hate something at the same time.
16. You (usually) get to be on bottom.
17. You can fake it if you’re tired or bored and they’ll never know.
18. Valentine’s Day is all about you.
19. Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable” just makes you happy even if you hate the song.
20. Baking is also a stress reliever.
21. You can get a massage without a hardon.
22. “That time of the month” is a great excuse to be a bitch for a week.
23. It’s also the best and most effective way to turn a guy down.
24. OMG shoes.
25. You think the idea of sack-tapping a guy is funny.
26. It’s perfectly normal to have a 2 hour conversation with your best friend.
27. In books or movies, happy endings actually make you happy.
28. You read instructions.
29. You already know you’ll be successful.
30. The current president just makes you realize women should rule the world.
31. You too get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours.
32. Clothes shopping is not just a chore.
33. Sex and the City.
34. You never have to worry that by just picking up something you’ll crush it.
35. If there’s a mirror, you’ll find it.
36. No one seriously questions your sexuality if you kiss the same sex.
37. Video games will forever be retarded.
38. You love miniature things, like mini gummy bears or tiny marshmallows.
39. Victoria's Secret Lip Plumper is just fun.
40. God gave you enough blood to work both.
41. Your ego isn’t the size of the US.
42. Everything you need is in your purse.
43. You take hot baths when you need to relax.
44. You’re not considered a pussy if you don’t hook up.
45. You feel totally comfortable asking for help or advice when lost or stuck.
46. They buy the condoms.
47. The Notebook.
48. You can cry your way out of a speeding ticket.
49. The thought of dinner with his family doesn’t scare you.
50. The closet is yours and yours alone.
51. The movie 300 kinda made you orgasm. Just a little.
52. When you’re mad, they might not find out until later when it’s convenient for you to let them know.
53. Girls’ nights whomp ass over boys’ nights.
54. You never have to deal with fixing electronics or cars.
55. You’re hygienic.
56. You can dance with the same sex at every opportunity.
57. You know how to match.
58. You know how to fold clothes.
59. No one is afraid of you when you walk down a dark alley at night.
60. Just talking about it makes you feel better.
61. Prince William is now single.
62. You never have to worry that the kid isn’t really yours.
63. No one thinks it’s weird if you squeal or make noises instead of words.
64. The idea of a man servant really appeals to you.
65. You will never be drafted.
66. No one secretly wonders how big you really are.
67. You support world peace.