You have a face only a mother could love - and she hates it!
Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
Your mom is so ugly she needs two bags to cover her face.
You're so ugly if my dog looked like you, I'd shave its ass and teach it to walk backwards!
I'll hit you so hard your kids will be born dizzy!
Your mom eats dead babies.
Your mom is so fat that people practice by climbing Mt. Everest before they climb her.
One more wrinkle and you'd pass for a prune.
Your mom is so ugly, your daddy brings her to work so he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
Your face is so ugly when you cry the tears run up your face.
Your mom is so fat, when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw peanuts at her!
There is one difference between a rooster and your mom. The rooster says cock-a-doodle doo, your mama says any-cock'll do.
Your mom is like a vacumm, she sucks, she blows and she gets laid in the closet.
You're like a light switch, even a little kid can turn you on.
Your Mom was good last night and I left her money under the pillow.
Your mom is so fat, that when she saw a yellow bus full of white kids go by, she said 'Stop that twinkie!'
You're so fat, that you have to strap a beeper on your belt to warn people you are backing up.
You're so ugly your face is closed on weekends!
You're so ugly if you joined an ugly contest, they'd say 'Sorry, no professionals!'
I think you should live for the moment. But after that I doubt I'll think so.
Your mom is so fat she swallowed my mom whole.
Your mom is so stupid she thought that MySpace was a sexual position.
You're the best at all you do - and all you do is make people hate you.
You're so fat a picture of you would fall off the wall!
Your mom is so fat, the astronauts keep believing there is a dimple on the Earth.
I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.
Your mom is outer space.
You're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mother!
Your mom is so stupid she took me to the movie theater to see 'Closed For The Season'.